Infant crying is normal
Nothing prepares you for how much a young baby can cry. Many parents assume that a lot of crying means they are doing something wrong. The NHS message is the opposite: crying is normal, and it is the main way a baby can tell you they need something.
Crying tends to increase from around 2 weeks old, often peaking at about 6 to 8 weeks, and then gradually settles. Knowing that there is a peak — and that it passes — can make the hardest weeks easier to get through.
NHS services use the ICON approach to support parents with crying. It stands for:
- I — Infant crying is normal.
- C — Comforting methods can help.
- O — It’s OK to walk away.
- N — Never, ever shake a baby.
Common reasons babies cry
There is not always a reason you can find, but the NHS lists these common causes:
- Hunger.
- A wet or dirty nappy.
- Tiredness.
- Wind.
- Being too hot or too cold.
- Simply wanting to be held.
It can help to go through these in order, like a checklist, especially at night when it is hard to think clearly. Hunger is often first: crying is a late hunger sign, so if your baby has been stirring, rooting or sucking their hands before crying, a feed may be what they need. Our answer on how often newborns feed explains the early feeding cues.
Comforting methods that can help
Once you have checked the basics, these are the comforting methods NHS services suggest:
- Hold your baby close, or try skin-to-skin contact.
- Talk, hum or sing softly, or play calm music or a steady background sound.
- Gently rock your baby.
- Go for a walk with the pram or a sling.
- Try a warm bath — some babies settle afterwards.
Different methods work on different days, and something that settled your baby last week might not work tonight. You may try all of these and your baby may still cry. That is OK, and it is not your fault.
It’s OK to walk away
Constant crying is exhausting and stressful, especially when you are short of sleep. Feeling frustrated, tearful or angry does not make you a bad parent. What matters is what you do next.
If you feel stressed, NHS services advise putting your baby down safely on their back in their cot and leaving the room for a few minutes. Take some deep breaths, have a drink, or call someone you trust. Go back when you feel calmer. A baby crying safely in their cot for a few minutes is far better than a parent at breaking point holding them.
If there is another adult at home, take turns. Even a short break — a shower, a walk round the block — can reset how you feel.
Never, ever shake a baby
Shaking a baby can cause serious brain injury or death. If you ever feel that you might lose control, put your baby down safely, walk away and ask for help.
It is worth telling everyone who cares for your baby — partners, grandparents, babysitters — about ICON and about walking away. Anyone can reach the end of their patience with a crying baby. Having a plan for that moment protects your baby.
Sharing the load
Crying is easier to cope with when it is shared. Agreeing who takes which part of the evening, or who does the first night shift, gives each adult something to look forward to: a protected block of rest.
Handovers work better with context. When you hand a crying baby to someone else, it helps to say when they last fed, slept and had a nappy change, so the next person can go straight to the right comfort rather than starting from scratch.
Zaripo is being prepared as a shared care diary where each caregiver can see the latest synced feed, sleep and nappy entries before taking over. It does not interpret crying, detect illness or tell you why your baby is crying. If you are worried about your baby’s crying, contact a health professional.
When crying can be a sign that something is wrong
Most crying is normal. Sometimes crying is part of a baby being unwell. Pay attention if the crying is different from usual — weaker, more high-pitched, or it does not stop — or if it comes with other signs such as a high temperature or not feeding. The lists below show when NHS services advise getting urgent advice or emergency help. Our answer on fever in babies explains temperature thresholds by age.
You can also get help for yourself. If you are struggling to cope, your health visitor or GP can support you.
When to get help
Get urgent advice — contact a GP, health visitor or midwife, or NHS 111 in the UK — if:
- Your baby cries constantly and you cannot comfort them.
- Their cry sounds different from usual, such as weak or high-pitched.
- They are also not feeding, have a high temperature or seem unwell.
- You are struggling to cope. Your health visitor can also help.
Call your emergency number now — 999 in the UK, 112 in Turkey and most of Europe — if:
- Your baby has difficulty breathing, is floppy or very hard to wake.
- Your baby has blue, grey or very pale skin or lips.
Outside the UK, use your local doctor, health line or emergency number. Trust your instincts: if you are worried about your baby, get help.
Questions parents also ask
When does newborn crying peak?
NHS services explain that crying often increases from about 2 weeks old and peaks at around 6 to 8 weeks, then gradually settles.
What does ICON stand for?
Infant crying is normal; Comforting methods can help; it’s OK to walk away; Never, ever shake a baby. NHS services use it to help parents cope with crying.
Is it OK to leave my baby to cry for a few minutes?
If you feel stressed, NHS services advise putting your baby down safely on their back in their cot and leaving the room for a few minutes until you feel calmer. Then go back to them.
How can I tell if crying means my baby is ill?
Watch for a cry that is different from usual, such as weak or high-pitched, crying that does not stop, or crying with other signs such as a high temperature, not feeding or seeming unwell. Get urgent advice in those situations.
Can an app tell me why my baby is crying?
No. A care diary can show when your baby last fed, slept or had a nappy change, which can help you check the basics. It cannot interpret crying or detect illness.